Disability & Sexuality: History, Barriers and Still Stigma
Contrary to popular belief, people with disabilities are sexual beings. Having a disability, cognitive or physical, doesn’t impact your ability to be sexual, have desires and want to express them. Unfortunately, the sexuality of persons with a disability may be oppressed by their supports, medical professionals and society at large.
What do we mean by sexuality? Sexuality encompasses our sexual identity and our capacity for sexual feelings. Whilst our sexual preferences are an important part of our identity, sexuality embodies more than who we are attracted to. Sexuality is the way we express ourselves sexually and if we choose to at all.
‘A basic need and aspect of being human, cannot be separated from other aspects of life, includes the physical, physiological, psychological, social, emotional, cultural and ethical dimensions of sex and gender, influences thought, feelings, actions and interactions and affects our mental and physical health,’ (Gomez 2012).
It helps us understand many parts of ourselves; values, bodies, beliefs, desires, genders, relationships, how we think, feel and react to these. Not to marginalise the estimated roughly 1% of the population who identify as Asexual (someone not experiencing/very little sexual attraction), but for the majority, we are all sexual beings. Despite this, individuals with a disability have limited access to fundamental sex education, denying them an opportunity to form this part of their identity.
How one person experiences and expresses themselves is different from one person to the next. We know sexuality looks different for everyone, so why do we think it doesn’t apply to people with a disability?
Historical views on disability
It wasn’t until the late 20th century that society shifted its understanding of people with a disability. In industrialised countries, disability was segregated. Persons with a physical or intellectual disability were hidden away in institutions, kept under marital constraint and sterilised as part of the eugenics movement (Baynton 2011).
Dr WP Birmingham of the Board of Visitors of the Claremont Hospital for the Insane wrote in his 1913 report that it was regrettable, but persons with an intellectual disability were ‘unfitted for unrestricted liberty’, and there was a need to avoid their multiplication (Find & Connect).
Gomez brings to light the mistreatment of people with an intellectual disability in these institutions if they were found to be pursuing a relationship or sexual activities. Some measures condemning the behaviour included lemon juice on genitals, shaving heads and chemical or surgical suppression to reduce sexual desires (Gomez 2012).
Whether it was the return home of WWII soldiers, many now with a disability or JFK advocating for the rights of persons with intellectual disabilities, the 1960s saw ideas around disability shift.
The 1986 Disability Services Act was a massive step in disability advocacy in Australia, intended to support choice and control in decision-making and reshape how services are funded. It was a shift away from institutionalisation with a new focus on self-determination, self-representation and advocacy.
‘By denying individuals with intellectual disability the opportunity to learn about their sexuality and develop social relationships with others, society has denied them the right to self-fulfilment.’
(Swango-Wilson, 2008)
Whilst our policies change, and we advocate for accessibility, there are still deep seated stigmas against people with a disability. Often, the voices of individuals with a disability are filtered through service providers, professionals, carers and family members. Sometimes these filters, who mean well, might not be encouraging, advocating or believing the sexual needs of a person with a disability exist.
Barriers and stigmatisation
Someone with a disability may be limited to exploring their sexuality due to a lack of privacy or dependence on a caregiver in assisted living. Condition-related barriers can include the presence of pain, fatigue, medication or fluctuation in mental health.
A lack of inclusive sex education or segregation from peers meant people with disabilities missed out on conversations around sex and pleasure. Whilst the adolescent schoolyard exchanges most likely weren’t rooted in factual information, the lack of exposure to these discussions only aids the social barriers.
/ stig·ma / noun / originated from the Greek word ‘simádi’ meaning ‘mark.’
Society likes to label and see one or a few things as an identity for someone. There are many marks against people with disabilities we need to work on. But a particularly damaging idea is that people with a disability don’t have/aren’t interested in sex.
This is simply not the case. Studies show people with disabilities experience the same desire as those without. 93% of men with autism in this study reported experiencing sexual desire, and 42.2% of couples over 50 with a partner experiencing deafblindness are still sexually active (Fernandes & Gillberg, 2016) (Lehane, C., Dammeyer, J., Hovaldt, H., & Elsass, P., 2017).
Despite individuals with a disability likely to have the same sexual range as someone without, the barriers to enjoying equal sexual relationships are stacked against them.
‘I remember on Tinder a guy asked me, and of course, this was in his second line of conversation: Can you have sex?” I said, “Can you?’ Dr Danielle Sheypuk
Physical disability: Stigma
Persons with physical disabilities face barriers to participating in healthy sexual lives. Often desexualised, believed to be asexual, questioned how intimacy with them “would work” or health care professionals failing to discuss sexual health are all assumptions of non-existent sex life.
Sex sells, and it doesn’t help society’s misconceptions when we don’t see unconventional bodies represented in advertising or behaving sexually on screen. Perhaps society has a limited view of what sexual expression can look like outside the bounds of conventional sex.
Dr Danielle Sheypuk in her TED talk Every body: glamour, dateability, sexuality & disability says:
‘Or maybe it’s the conclusion drawn from mainstream porno, where we have actors performing like gymnastic stunts with the stamina that none of us have…the silent message, the more in shape your body, the better the sex. The unspoken conclusion: if you have a disability, you are too sick to have sex.’
Intellectual disability: Stigma
For someone with an intellectual disability, the stigmatisation faced is a little different. An intellectual disability is defined as differences in a person’s ability to learn at a certain speed and level, which impacts everyday living. According to the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare, 3% of Australians have an intellectual disability, making it the most common primary disability.
Kempton discusses sexuality and people with intellectual disabilities, writing ‘most parents regarded them as eternally innocent and sexless as they imagined all young children to be the forever child syndrome’ (Kempton 1991). Statements like “they have the body of an adult, but the brain of a child” and other “mental age theory” anecdotes remove choice, control and fundamental human rights.
‘Historically, so-called “mental age theory” has stripped people with intellectual and developmental disabilities of our dignity, our reproductive freedom and our parental rights…I am not mentally 12. I am mentally 28. I just have an intellectual disability,’ (Smith 2017).
A huge component of the eugenics movement, the use of “mental age theory” by health care professionals gives the perception to caregivers that their loved one with an intellectual disability is forever “childlike” and not an adult with sexual desires. But, intellectual disability or not, humans go through puberty, biological maturation and hormonal stages. People feel desires, urges, needs and fantasies regardless of cognitive ability.
Throughout history, people with physical, invisible and intellectual disabilities have been isolated. Even once the institutions were closed, segregation remained through the barriers and societal stigma.
Make sex education accessible
Sex-positive education is necessary to foster healthy and enjoyable sexual experiences. It must involve inclusive conversations about safe sex practices to prevent STIs and unwanted pregnancy, consent, trust and what a healthy sexual relationship could look like to you.
We shouldn’t be at a point of having to teach our most vulnerable about sexual violence as a preventative measure for abuse. But, a child with a disability is four times more likely to experience sexual harm than a non-disabled child. 21% of adults with a disability have experienced at least one account of sexual violence over 15 years old, compared to 10% of persons without a disability.
Women are also disproportionately affected. Women with Disabilities Australia found that 90% of women with an intellectual disability have been sexually abused, with a quarter of reported rapes in Victoria against women with a disability.
The onus of sexual assault is never on the victim, but inclusive, comprehensive sex education creates safer navigation through sexual identity and can help our awareness of abusive sexual behaviours. We need a culture wide shift in how we educate all people about consent and respect. This, along with accessible, sex-positive sex education, can help bridge the gap between people with a disability being able to participate equally as sexual citizens.
References
Abuse of People With Disability. Australian Federation of Disability Organisations.
Alarming Rates of Family, Domestic and Sexual Violence of Women and Girls With Disability to be Examined in Hearing. (October 12, 2021). Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of People with Disability.
Collier, L. (December, 2017). People With Physical Disabilities Fight Hurtful Stereotypes When Looking for Relationship Partners. American Psychological Association.
Baynton, D. C. (2011). ‘These Pushful Days’: Time and Disability in the Age of Eugenics. Health and History. 13(2), 43-64.
Entwistle, J. (February 10, 2020). Breaking the Stigma: Sexuality and Disability. Solutions for Living.
Eugenics (1910-1950) Western Australia - Glossary Term. Find & Connect.
Gomez, M. T. (2012). The S Words: Sexuality, Sensuality, Sexual Expression and People with Intellectual Disability. 30(2), 237-245.
Kempton, W., & Kahn, E. (1991). Sexuality and people with intellectual disabilities: A historical perspective. Sexuality and Disability, 9(2), 93–111.
Ryan, M. (April 4, 2022). The Historical Treatment of People With Disabilities in Australia [LinkedIn Post].
Smith, I. (September 7, 2017). Mental Age Theory Hurts People With Intellectual Disabilities. NOS Magazine.
Swango-Wilson, A. (2008). Caregiver Perceptions and Implications for Sex Education for Individuals with Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities. Sexuality and Disability. 26(2), 75–81.
TEDx Talks. (May 20, 2015). Every Body: Glamour, Dateability, Sexuality & Disability | Dr. Danielle Sheypuk | TEDxBarnardCollege. [Video]. YouTube.
Woodgate, R. L., Edwards, M., Ripat, J. D., Borton, B., & Rempel, G. (2015). Intense parenting: A qualitative study detailing the experiences of parenting children with complex care needs. BMC paediatrics, 15(1), 197-197.